I like to think that it’s because I hold myself to a high standard of gift giving that I struggle. Will she love it? Does he already have one similar? Would she want gray or orange? And then, to ease the stress, I step back and think: Well, I know I love it. And I know I don’t have one, and I’d take the orange. And so I do.

Of course this just perpetuates the problem. No one knows what else to buy me because they believe I’ve been so consumed with shopping for myself, and, it can’t be denied, I still don’t have gifts for them.

There is a way to end this shopping drama: Wish Lists. That’s right. There’s nothing distasteful about telling someone what you want. Think of it as a gift, really, to help them gift you well. You’re happy, they’re happy, retailers are happy that we aren’t all returning things. Some boutiques are having a lot of fun with wish lists this season: martinpatrick3 in the North Loop will actually send a card on your behalf to Santa (or Mommy, or anyone with a zip code, really) telling them what you want. StyledLife at Galleria is making wish lists a two day party this week. It’s called Show the Love. From 5 to 9 p.m. Wednesday, Dec. 14, the ladies are invited to shop and fill out a wish list, which StyledLife will present to the men the next evening, 5 to 9 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 15, when they are invited to shop, drink, and watch a little Sports Center while their perfect gifts are being wrapped. Music, refreshments and more frivolity will ensue both nights.

Whatever boutique you’re shopping, just ask–they are glad to help your wishes get fulfilled. Because telepathy just isn’t all that reliable.